Excerpts

Introduction

Why this book is important…

It’s rather ironic that people tend to take better care of their cars than their marriages. Think about it: in preparing for a long automobile trip, all systems—brakes, coolant system, tires, engine, etc.—are checked out and tuned up. People about to embark on a long journey don’t want to risk breaking an axle or having a tire blow out somewhere along the way.

Yet most couples, when they are embarking on the journey of a lifetime, don’t give their relationship even a quick once-over. Sadly, many of them may even ignore clear warning lights on the metaphorical dashboard before taking their wedding vows.

Defining Issues

Sexuality

“If sex is such a natural thing, how come there are so many books on how to do it?” — Bette Midler

“Sex lies at the root of life, and we can never learn to reverence life until we know how to understand sex.” — Henry Ellis

For most couples, one of the defining features of their love and commitment to each other is their sexual fidelity.

JUDY AND BUD

Judy and Bud had been sexually intimate for more than a year, yet they still hadn’t felt comfortable with the “frequency question,” or, as Judy put it, the “frequency problem.” Judy consistently felt greater sexual desire than Bud did. Initially Bud ascribed his lack of interest in making love to his stressful job and long hours. Judy’s job, however, was also stressful and her hours at work, including her commute, were actually longer than Bud’s.

When the Going Gets Rough

Parting Thoughts

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” — Germaine Greer

So what is this little book all about?

I hope that answering these questions has helped you get to know yourself a lot better, to consider how you will plan to become the person you aspire to be, and how you and your partner will grow together both as individuals and as a couple in the years to come.